How I almost suffocated at the Vienna Opera

Day 17:
Schonbrunn Palace. The only European Palace to rival Versailles. Stealing this word for word from Rick Steve's Eastern Europe book. I think not so much, but ok Steve, I mean Rick. We arrived at the palace, bought the Classic Pass ticket that includes palace grand tour, the maze, the viewing terrace, the gardens, and the strudel show. Strudel Show, Strudel Show! The interior of the palace was full of gold, green, red and ugly tapestry....everything you want in the monarchs' vacation palace. The strudel show however was extremely tacky, touristy, but unbelievably fun. Kat was picked out of the millions in the crowd for her strudel talents (it shows in the eyes if you look closely) to help put the strudel on the pan and butter it up. Check her out, master strudel maker (literally, she has the certificate).

Here is the castle from the viewing terrace.

We were also pretty pumped about the palace maze. Little did we know that getting lost on the way to the maze was going to be part of it. We were less than excited to be lost in the maze and finally made the destination. Happiness, pure happiness.

Note: if I went to high school with you, I met Mr. Lieberman at the palace with his entourage of 85 band members. They praised my sister. It was good.
As per Rick Steve's suggestion, we decided to be cultured and go to a classy Viennese music experience, the Opera. Little did we know, we might die trying. He suggested we get standing room tickets for 4 euro. A backpacker's dream really. We find the secret entrance to the standing room ticket office. We get excited. We buy tickets for the section right under the emperor's box. We find the box, think that our spaces are marked and go try to find food as we were hungry yet again. I decide to stay and get our seats anyway. If you're reading this and are planning on doing the same, don't. Bring scarves, trash bags, loin cloths, small animals, whatever you have that you can tie to a pole as those seats are gone gone gone within seconds. People get there, tie a scarf to a pole and that means their seat is saved. I get there and stand on a stair trying to pretend I know what I'm doing while the people in the know tell me even the stairs are saved by these elusive scarves. I was like a lost puppy. Might have been the most scary/angering moment in my life, or this trip. I finally secure a stair that can fit 2 people comfortably for 3. Katie and Kat come back from the snack time to help me man the stair as people were starting to crowd me. A man tries to explain to me that the napkin with a twig tied to the pole next to me means that that stair is his. WHAT. I think my face turned red I was so angry. I didn't move and he ended up not seeing the Opera so I was happy. We stayed for 30 minutes as there were 5 of us on that one stair, a tall Austrian man with a huge head was right in front of me, I couldn't breathe or move, the Opera was in German and we understood nothing, and it was steamingly hot. Great experience, but when I have money I am paying for a freakin chair. It might be worth it.
A nice lady let us walk through the opera after we left, these are faces of fear.

After that we went to eat at a Viennese style cafeteria and I met Freddy, a nice Nigerian man who at the end of the conversation was calling me his sister and telling me to visit the Nigerian ghetto when I go back there. Love it.
Vienna was good to us with torrential downpours, a whole lot of second hand smoke, efficient subways (or U-bahn), and croissants filled with hot dogs and cheese (Katie's favorite part).

Tomorrow....the West Virginia of Eastern Europe (Slovakia) and its Detroit (Bratislava).

Day 18:
We took a train from Vienna to Bratislava. Torrential downpours once again and even a non-mistakable tornado on the way. Eastern European weather has just been way too good to us. We arrive in Bratislava and the first thing we notice: no tourists. Success! We have finally gotten away from the zombie tourists. We stowed our packs and went sightseeing. Little did we know that we could have covered the entire city within 1 hour. Oh well, at least the tourists weren't there. Bratislava provided a nice getaway from the hectic, modern, European cities. It had charm, history, great souvenirs, and remnants of communist life. Here are the highlights:
The presidential residence, or the white house if you will.

A "0" km mark where all distances from Slovakia are measured. Here I am, by the holyland mark...fitting.

Highly-regarded-by-locals chocolate shop that serves melted chocolate as hot chocolate. Ok in my book.

The most famous statue in Bratislava of a working man. No good story there, just a statue.

And another scandalous approach to a statue.

All in all, Bratislava was nice. We had some excellent food at a poor man's pub and continued on our way that very same day to BudaPest (said Budapesht).
We arrived in Budapest at evening time to find no ATM's, cabbies that hassle you for a ride, a lack of metro signs, and extreme teenage PDA on the subway. Our hostel is a little, ok a lot, outside the main tourist areas....consolation, it's nice, clean, we have it all to ourselves and the manager is an attractive Hungarian mountain biker. We settle in, get a free shot of unicum, the traditional Hungarian liqour, and start our plan for food. We get ready to leave and once more, without fail, torrential downpours. But this one was different. Lightening, thunder, and massive, I mean massive amounts of rain. It was starting to flood. We were hungry. So Kat and I put on our rain jackets, got our safety whistles and flashlights, and rolled up our pants to go scour for food.

We get outside and it's not really raining anymore. Such is life. Acceptance please.
We get some gyros and falafel, along with hazelnut wafers with a questionable aftertaste. World Cup Game with a strange archeological fellow housemate and sleep.

Day 19:
We awake to the smell of brewing coffee, the attractive mountain biker, and fresh granola. Always the way I want to wake up by the way. We get ready for the day, eat a whole lot of this delicious Hungarian Muzli and plan our day of fun. First off, a market full of meat, produce, cheese, souvenirs and lots of paprika (both as a spice and pepper). Beautiful.

Also, Kat was magnetized once again to the fur hats. Summer essentials guys.

After a nice stroll in the market we embarked on our leisurely 10 km stroll down
Vaci Utca, Andrassy Ut., towards the Museum of Terror and the Szechenyi Baths. Leisure.
Actually, the whole thing was pretty leisurely and here are the sites we were able to witness.
Vaci Utca and the ridiculously toursity side of Hungary. Complete with the most famous restaurant/bakery in Budapest called Gerbeaud. Delicious and full of pigeons walking the floors. Not for the light hearted or those scared of pigeons (Katie).

The second largest synagogue in the world. Breathtakingly beautiful and it had what I think is the most touching Holocaust memorial I have seen to day. It's a willow tree monument that is supposed to look like an upside down menorah. Each leaf has the name of a victim and the words at top are truly meaningful.

The Budapest Opera. Another of Rick's recommendations for the city that we decided would be a most painful experience if we were to try it once again. But here I am showing my talents to the people of Hungary. Well received I would say.

And...last but not least strolls through parks with lots of candy and pastry stands, more palaces, and the Szechenyi baths. Rick gave it 3 stars so it was a must. We get there 1 hour before it closes. Oops. We don't get the promised off peak discount and we pay more than the book listed. We get confused by the immense amount of staircases, changing cabins, lockers, and doors. We get told to be back within 20 minutes. We get into a pool and it's not as warm as our showers. There are potbellied Hungarian men everywhere and a whole lot of nakedness. The building is beautiful though.

Maybe it's because we are seasoned thermal bath bathers, but Blue Lagoon....much better, less ugliness. Budapest is wonderful though. I would live here too. Great food, environmentally friendly atmosphere, less smoke, and more culture. Besides....the paprika is really the reason I would move. Sweet and spicy.
PS Budapest is divided by the Danube River into Buda and Pest. We did Pest today. Buda's castle hill tomorrow and then a 9 hour train to Ljubljana, Slovenia in the afternoon. Good thing we found an English bookstore here.
Also, we are currently enthralled by a Hungarian movie that includes the following: the mating of horses, dog shootings, betting of some sort, anger, and no English.

These coins are weighing me down

6 days....6 long days and 4 countries. That's right ladies and gentlemen. We have been to 4 countries in the past 6 days and it was good.
To start off, let's continue our journey in the ever so gloomy Czech Republic.
Day 14:
We woke up ridiculously early to catch a bus to Cesky Krumlov. Not only was it pouring rain, but the bus station wasn't even really in Prague, or what we thought should have counted as the borders of Prague. Point: it was far away. Bus arrived, we got on, that bus was awesome, it had free coffee and hot chocolate. Go European bus lines. We took a nice leisurely nap on the bus after drinking our free hot chocolate. It was yum. We went for a second round, but only to figure out, and by figure out I mean we were yelled at by a very angry Czech bus stewardess "not for you!!!!" Katie ran away in fear and cuddled on my shoulder for comfort. I laughed. Pleasant experience I would say. We arrive in Cesky Krumlov, and guess what? It's still raining. We get off the bus and commence our "10 minute" walk to the hostel. No no, we have our own way, or should I say Katie's own way of arriving at our hostel. Guys, let's take this ridiculously curvy, forest-y looking road to a random bridge in the middle of nowhere, cross it, find some construction and construction workers and then climb up a hill. Yes! What a great idea. As you can tell, we will now always have Katie as our beacon of direction. Lost in Cesky Krumlov, we sent Kat out to scour the area for some sense of direction. She, again, had to hop over a barrier, it wasn't her fault that it was in the way.

She oriented us in the right direction and we finally made it to our hostel. Krumlov House Hostel, my favorite one yet. They gave us an entire apartment with clean sheets, towels, and some attractive backpackers. Well, not in the apartment, but still. They also recommended a delicious little lunch special in the old town that really made us instantly love Krumlov. Look at that warm leek soup. To die for.

We were obviously exhausted from the rough yelling on the bus to the taxing meal we just ate, so we went to take a nap. Glorious! Don't judge, it was our first and only nap this entire trip. After a hibernating period, we went for some more food. Cesky Krumlov had a lot of it to offer, so we took advantage in a non-evil way. We went to the most touristy square for the coffee and dessert special. We ordered the coffee and dessert thinking it would come as the special. Again, we should probably stop thinking because it hasn't been working in our favor. We paid about $25 for 3 apple strudels and some coffee. FAIL. We tried to ask for the special price, but the woman was relentless and kept mentioning how much strudel we ate, we let it go. Good thing it was delicious or else I would have apple strudeled her face. Not literally.

We took it in good heart and instead complained about it for our half hour walk to the Krumlov castle. It helped, we were pretty happy when we arrived.

The castle is guarded by real bears, even though the only people that go in there are tourists and people who try to rip them off. I think I am going to apply that sort of security in Baltimore. Useful. We climbed up to the top of some tower and on the way found some prisoner bones and bells. Spectacular view though:

We came back down, looped around some gardens that, according to the queen of castle gardens (Katie) was apparently disappointing and decided to go for a cheap supermarket dinner. We are getting pretty good at those. We might start renting our services. If you need a cheap dinner that consists mostly of carbs, bananas and pastries, you know who to call. Tomorrow.....Salzburg, Austria and a real Sound of Music Tour, YES!

Day 15:
We get to the hostel entrance at 9 am to pick up our $30 laundry, that's right, $30 for a couple of shirts, some socks and underwear and a pair of pants or two. Whatever, moo point (hope you got the reference, if not, it's moot). We waited to be picked up by our legitimate van service to Salzburg. I say legitimate because it was booked by our hostel, it cost a lot of money, it's the only real way to get to Salzburg, and because the next few sentences will sound sketchy. We meet our driver, nice guy, who is waiting for the van to get there. The van gets there with another car and a man with long hair that hasn't been washed in a while, a full jean outfit (jacket and pants), and lots and lots of tattoos but no English whatsoever. We try to get into the van with our nice driver, but instead we take the private car with sketchy man. We drive and drive and drive. The only words that come out of his mouth in English are.... "ok." We then stop at a less than attractive car dealer and he gets out of the car and imitates stretching. Great. Now we're getting exercise lessons from our Czech driver. It rains, we eat some cookies and we keep on driving. He gets lost with his GPS and we give up and get out of the car 2 blocks, on a hill, from our destination. We walk with the smell of manure to Haus Lindner, a nice B&B in the middle of farm country on the hills of Salzburg. Mathilda, our host, was pleasant, but had cats. Allergies galore. We enter our room with a balcony looking over the singing hills. I step out onto the balcony to enjoy the mountainous view, but instead, I enjoy or I guess recoiled in horror from a different mountainous view, a naked old man. What? This is the welcome I get from Salzburg. This Sound of Music tour better be really good. We were so hungry, and all we had for lunch was a plethora of granola bars, salt with some peanuts, and broken vanilla cookies on the floor of the cat hair filled room. The Sound of Music van showed up 45 minutes late, so we happily jumped on the van and headed for the city centre. We arrived to the glorious sight of a Sound of Music bus, filled with pictures of Julie Andrews and the von Trapp family.

Our excitement....pretty intense.

We did not take this bus. Instead we got on the boring, picture-less bus. A snobby, rude woman walks by us telling us that SHE will be the first one to get on the bus, because if she doesn't get on, no one does. That was our guide and this attitude continued for four hours amongst conversations of alcohol intake with little children. Just plain awkward.
The tour was interesting. Mostly it was interesting to learn that most of the movie was actually filmed in the US. But some of the sites we found were pretty cool. There were hills, they looked like they could have been alive with music at some point, and we found the infamous 16 going on 17 gazeebo. It's closed now because an 82 year old was hopping on the benches having her husband sing to her, her hip had other plans.

The hills:

The church where the captain and Maria got married:

We also found the do, re, mi song steps:

And check out this photography genius:
Raindrops on roses and schnitzel....with potatoes? Whatever, it works.


Something unique to Salzburg...Mozart balls. Not invented by Mozart but it's chocolatey goodness.

All in all, Salzburg is beautiful, cloudy, and slightly gloomy. Next.
Train to Vienna!

Day 16:
Took a train to Vienna and once again the skies opened and the rain came down. We got soaked on the way to our hostel, dropped our bags, and decided to be adventurous abigails and walk the town. I suggested we take a bus in the pouring rain, but was shut down immediately. Scale of misery was 12 out of 10. Kat broke down and we decided to take the metro with soaking wet pants, shoes, and socks. Check out the attractiveness of those yellow pants.

We took lunch at a traditional Austrian something that started with an H. Delicious. Kat's stomach could stomach 5 large plates of food. The waitress was shocked, but the dog wasn't and it was adorable.


After lunching, we went to the only indoor attraction, the Haus Der Musik. We walked through the many interactive music exhibits and were able to create our own waltz, listen to some Mozart, and conduct the Vienna Philharmonic. Kat was the only one that failed and got yelled at by first violin guy.



More Vienna tomorrow.

That Girl Needs the Lord and a Shower

Oh hello faithful readers,
Assuming you have not gotten tired of our adventures, I'm going to keep putting off sleep to entertain you. Yes, I know, selfless. Sooooooo. Let us get right to the point and start with our last day in Krakow.
Day 10:
We awoke to our New Zealand neighbours at the hostel eating breakfast. They were nice fellows. We went downstairs to pay our more than funny french/polish host who spoke excellent english but insisted on only speaking french. Weird. We paid for our tour to Auschwitz and tried to scarf down some bread before leaving on the most nauseating van ride I hope to ever have. The combination of the terrible polish driving, a video about the Holocaust, and the back seat of a van do not mix well together. Don't try this at home. After 40 minutes of intense deep breathing and large gulps of water, we reached the town of Oswiecim. We followed our crazy driver to meet our tour guide (who apparently looked like a Polish version of Charlie Sheen?). To be serious though, cause this is quite a serious matter. After 3 hours at Auschwitz and Birkenau, seeing the sites, the land, the prison buildings, the execution wall and the train tracks all I can say is eerie. Eerie and overwhelming. I always thought that it was hard to connect to the Holocaust as something other than literally unbelievable because of it's gravity, even for me. Our guide stressed that we knew nothing about these people except their date of birth and date of death, maybe even their names. This makes it hard to really fathom the extent of the human destruction and makes it difficult to really know what these people went through. The fear, the anger, the disbelief, and the possible hope will forever be remembered. I would like to say that the one true hope is that history won't repeat itself. Here is the famous sign and the prisoner bunk building:


After a tiring, sweltering day and another van ride that was quite memorable, we arrived back to Krakow extremely hungry. We had to catch a bus to Zakopane, the Polish resort town. So we headed straight from our hostel to the bus station, eating slices of bread along the way. It's like Hansel and Gretel, except we were so hungry, we left no crumbs. At the bus station, we were quite proud of ourselves for buying tickets and then buying strange round Polish bread things for the ride. We get to the track and our bus doesn't arrive. A new bus comes in and we try to get on it, only to be yelled at by an angry Polish bus driver. That's right, the communist attitude is still present in some people (but really only a handful). Apparently if your bus doesn't show up, that does not mean you can get on the next bus, no no. You MUST purchase new tickets for the new bus that says 5:10 instead of 4:55. Excellent. Also, beware of weird men who give you Jesus brochures in Polish. We decided that Kat must have looked like she needed the Lord and a shower, so she was the target of this religious gift.

The ride down to Zakopane (said Zah-Koh-Pah-neh)was quite lovely. Hills, colorful homes, sheep, playing children, and a horizon. Zakopane itself is just a small town in the south of Poland overlooking the High Tatras. BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL and equally unbelievable. We strolled the small streets and had ourselves a traditional Polish meal with pork, huntsmen sauce, grilled chicken, steamed veggies, and homemade bread with....lard? Yes, lard goes well with bread. I do not know how Polish people are so skinny, lard does not make for a pretty figure. We decided that the lard wouldn't really finish the job, so we went for some lody (ice cream) and ate it on our hostel balcony that overlooked the main street. Unforgettable moment. Our tired feet enjoyed this whole process:


Day 11/Beginning day of World Cup:
This was our plan, see if you think it's crazy or crazy awesome. Wake up really early, eat, leave hostel, take bus to cable car, take cable car to mountains, hike for 3 hours, come back by 11 am, shower, check out of hostel, shop in Zakopane for a few hours, get a bus back to Krakow, eat dinner, take night train to Prague. How great does that sound? If you are reading this and planning to do the same thing, don't. Do not plan to just waltz onto the cable car, that's a false dream. You must stand in line for at least an hour to only buy tickets to your cable car, by which point you would have let's say maybe 20 minutes to hike the High Tatras, come back on the cable car and make sure you don't get a late fee from your hostel. Oh well. Look at this view and plan accordingly as the mountains are absolutely breathtaking. Playing with snow in the summer is also a huge plus.



Since the Tatras lie on the border between Poland and Slovakia, we were excited to know that we would be going to Slovakia that day to get a peak before we actually went to Bratislava in a few days. We are so good at border crossings:

After a hiking fail, we rushed back to check out of our hostel and decided that the shopping and strolling was not to be given up. So we strolled, and purchased several items that included dresses, shirts, postcards and a whole lot of lody. Look at her happy face, it's as if they were meant to be.

Also, I tried my hardest to find Polish/Czech shoes called Haker comfort shoes. If you know them, or how to get them, contact me please. It was a hunt for these shoes that I have never seen before. We were ruthless, but failed miserably. Let's make sure we never have to look for shoes if we're going on the Amazing Race because I would be left behind.
So, back in Krakow, we scavenged some more for these shoes and then went to the train station to board our very first night train! Complete with bunk beds, a sink, lots of buttons and extreme heat. We met our nice neighbours, one of which works for the Price is Right with buddy Drew. No way man. I was hoping he'd offer us all to meet Drew at some point, but that didn't happen, so I tried being nice anyway. Our porter was a 60 year old man who had a great Czech-English accent and told us not to be scared of him. I wanted to put him in my pocket, but figured it would elicit questions. Night trian compartments are cramped:


Day 12:
We made it through the 7-8 hour ride a little tired and a lot sweaty, but we had our trusty baby wipes for a shower, so don't be scared. We shall remain clean through thick and thin. Voila Prague, here we are.
The 30 minute walk to our hostel was less than pleasant but we were excited to be in Prague, I mean, it's Prague. The city that everyone raves about. Let's just say this Prague, I've had better. It might be because the city is swarming with toursits who push, shove, and yell or it might be the plethora of homeless people with their smoke, dogs, and smell. I really can't tell you what it is, but I much preferred Poland. The cities in Eastern Europe are just as pretty, less crowded, with better service and better food. Don't get me wrong, Prague is gorgeous, but when you combine it with the ugly tourist face, it get's less pretty as the day goes on. We went for a large and quite delicious breakfast at Bohemian Bagel, a little taste of home. We then tried to go tour the Old Town, got mad at all the tourists, and decided to go to a chocolate factory to make ourselves feel better. Wonderful experience as we were the only ones there. We got to pet some rabbits, learn about Mayan choclate drinks and paint with chocolate. Here is my painting of the old story of the sheep who was scared to go to hell because of the lion devil. Oh you don't know that one? I might have made it up, I can't remember. Those Nigerian kids books were weird.

We were given a quiz at the tour, which we of course answered perfectly. Here is our prize. Homemade Czech chocolate.

Our second attempt at touring Prague, although unwillfully, was much more successful. Maybe it was tourist nap time. We saw the Prague Castle, the changing of the guards, the botanical gardens, and some predatory birds. It was nice. Although Katie would have rather sat on a bench eating lody, which she made quite clear. My parenting convinced her to reluctantly enjoy the city. We took Frommer's suggestions of unforgettable moments and decided to go on a boat tour down the Vltava. Let's just say we will not be trusting Katie's book much longer. Very forgettable. But we got free lody, a free beer, and a guide that spoke Italian as a consolation.
We made our own unforgettable moment though. Watching the World Cup in the middle of the Old Town in Prague surrounded by people who like soccer. It was magical. I was rooting for England, because, let's face it, they have nice looking players. Wayne Rooney, yes please. Look at how happy we are! Forgettable? I think not.


The tie ended with Katie promising us small lodys, which we never received. I'm keeping the tally. We had wonderful plans for our next day beginning with a Catholic mass in the Czech language, the Jewish Quarter, Troja Castle to avoid the tourists, and a Black Light Theatre show. Wait till you hear about it all in one second.

Day 13:
We awoke early to attend Catholic mass at St. James church in the Old Town. My idea of course seeing as how I'm so close to Catholicism. It was a great experience. I understood nothing and felt completely awkward sitting there being Jewish, but, a cultural experience not many have had. I'll be adding it to the list of great things I've done. Next time, I'll try and be closer to my heritage and go to a Jewish service. But look how fancy (and clean) we are.

The Jewish Quarter, makes you pay. Not much for students, but quite a lot for people who forget their student ID's in the US (Katie). Think of all the lody you could have bought with the saved money :( We toured the synagogues which you can't take pictures of, so no evidence guys, no evidence. You can google them as they are quite simple, but striking. The Spanish Synagogue is particularly ornate and has a lot of crowns, silver, and books. A very interesting history I would say. I think the exhibit I enjoyed the most was the artwork from the children of the Terezin ghetto. Really special and mostly saddening. We went for a quick (that's really a relative term I guess) bite at the Franz Kafka cafe. Rick Steves' only terrible recommendation thus far. Don't go there, it's not pleasant. We then tried to avoid all the tourists by going to "Prague's hidden treasure" in Troja. The Troja castle. A 2.5 km walk from the Old Town. LIES. The castle, which was not on a map anywhere in Prague, is close to the Praha zoo. The zoo is an hour walk from the city. Great. Thanks Let's Go. We wandered around aimlessly at a less than pretty part of Prague for about an hour, asked a nice tattooed gentlemen how to get there, got the ugly truth, and left in anger. We were trying so hard to like Prague, but this is making it really difficult. Instead, we went back to our hostel, played on the computer/napped and then went to the a show called Studio Clip at the Black Light Theatre. Black Light shows are very unique to Prague involving black lights, acrobats, weird humor and some crudeness apparently. This is what we got: a mix of Lady Gaga, Cirque de Soleil, and psychedelic backgrounds. Very strange, but I guess a true Praha experience? I think I would recommend it if you're looking for the weird side of Prague, or the very weird side. Outside the theatre we found this gem in the midst of the World Cup frenzy:

Riding a soccer ball, maybe a new unforgettable moment in Praha. Tomorrow we head to Cesky Krumlov. What used to be an undiscovered part of the Czech Republic but apprently is now discovered by the tourist mob. We are hoping for the best, but I think we all decided that away from the mob is the best place to be. Poland, I miss you. Maybe in Hungary we can once again be alone with Europe. For now, we'll try our best to not hate Czechia and maybe enjoy the skies a little more.