That Girl Needs the Lord and a Shower

Oh hello faithful readers,
Assuming you have not gotten tired of our adventures, I'm going to keep putting off sleep to entertain you. Yes, I know, selfless. Sooooooo. Let us get right to the point and start with our last day in Krakow.
Day 10:
We awoke to our New Zealand neighbours at the hostel eating breakfast. They were nice fellows. We went downstairs to pay our more than funny french/polish host who spoke excellent english but insisted on only speaking french. Weird. We paid for our tour to Auschwitz and tried to scarf down some bread before leaving on the most nauseating van ride I hope to ever have. The combination of the terrible polish driving, a video about the Holocaust, and the back seat of a van do not mix well together. Don't try this at home. After 40 minutes of intense deep breathing and large gulps of water, we reached the town of Oswiecim. We followed our crazy driver to meet our tour guide (who apparently looked like a Polish version of Charlie Sheen?). To be serious though, cause this is quite a serious matter. After 3 hours at Auschwitz and Birkenau, seeing the sites, the land, the prison buildings, the execution wall and the train tracks all I can say is eerie. Eerie and overwhelming. I always thought that it was hard to connect to the Holocaust as something other than literally unbelievable because of it's gravity, even for me. Our guide stressed that we knew nothing about these people except their date of birth and date of death, maybe even their names. This makes it hard to really fathom the extent of the human destruction and makes it difficult to really know what these people went through. The fear, the anger, the disbelief, and the possible hope will forever be remembered. I would like to say that the one true hope is that history won't repeat itself. Here is the famous sign and the prisoner bunk building:


After a tiring, sweltering day and another van ride that was quite memorable, we arrived back to Krakow extremely hungry. We had to catch a bus to Zakopane, the Polish resort town. So we headed straight from our hostel to the bus station, eating slices of bread along the way. It's like Hansel and Gretel, except we were so hungry, we left no crumbs. At the bus station, we were quite proud of ourselves for buying tickets and then buying strange round Polish bread things for the ride. We get to the track and our bus doesn't arrive. A new bus comes in and we try to get on it, only to be yelled at by an angry Polish bus driver. That's right, the communist attitude is still present in some people (but really only a handful). Apparently if your bus doesn't show up, that does not mean you can get on the next bus, no no. You MUST purchase new tickets for the new bus that says 5:10 instead of 4:55. Excellent. Also, beware of weird men who give you Jesus brochures in Polish. We decided that Kat must have looked like she needed the Lord and a shower, so she was the target of this religious gift.

The ride down to Zakopane (said Zah-Koh-Pah-neh)was quite lovely. Hills, colorful homes, sheep, playing children, and a horizon. Zakopane itself is just a small town in the south of Poland overlooking the High Tatras. BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL and equally unbelievable. We strolled the small streets and had ourselves a traditional Polish meal with pork, huntsmen sauce, grilled chicken, steamed veggies, and homemade bread with....lard? Yes, lard goes well with bread. I do not know how Polish people are so skinny, lard does not make for a pretty figure. We decided that the lard wouldn't really finish the job, so we went for some lody (ice cream) and ate it on our hostel balcony that overlooked the main street. Unforgettable moment. Our tired feet enjoyed this whole process:


Day 11/Beginning day of World Cup:
This was our plan, see if you think it's crazy or crazy awesome. Wake up really early, eat, leave hostel, take bus to cable car, take cable car to mountains, hike for 3 hours, come back by 11 am, shower, check out of hostel, shop in Zakopane for a few hours, get a bus back to Krakow, eat dinner, take night train to Prague. How great does that sound? If you are reading this and planning to do the same thing, don't. Do not plan to just waltz onto the cable car, that's a false dream. You must stand in line for at least an hour to only buy tickets to your cable car, by which point you would have let's say maybe 20 minutes to hike the High Tatras, come back on the cable car and make sure you don't get a late fee from your hostel. Oh well. Look at this view and plan accordingly as the mountains are absolutely breathtaking. Playing with snow in the summer is also a huge plus.



Since the Tatras lie on the border between Poland and Slovakia, we were excited to know that we would be going to Slovakia that day to get a peak before we actually went to Bratislava in a few days. We are so good at border crossings:

After a hiking fail, we rushed back to check out of our hostel and decided that the shopping and strolling was not to be given up. So we strolled, and purchased several items that included dresses, shirts, postcards and a whole lot of lody. Look at her happy face, it's as if they were meant to be.

Also, I tried my hardest to find Polish/Czech shoes called Haker comfort shoes. If you know them, or how to get them, contact me please. It was a hunt for these shoes that I have never seen before. We were ruthless, but failed miserably. Let's make sure we never have to look for shoes if we're going on the Amazing Race because I would be left behind.
So, back in Krakow, we scavenged some more for these shoes and then went to the train station to board our very first night train! Complete with bunk beds, a sink, lots of buttons and extreme heat. We met our nice neighbours, one of which works for the Price is Right with buddy Drew. No way man. I was hoping he'd offer us all to meet Drew at some point, but that didn't happen, so I tried being nice anyway. Our porter was a 60 year old man who had a great Czech-English accent and told us not to be scared of him. I wanted to put him in my pocket, but figured it would elicit questions. Night trian compartments are cramped:


Day 12:
We made it through the 7-8 hour ride a little tired and a lot sweaty, but we had our trusty baby wipes for a shower, so don't be scared. We shall remain clean through thick and thin. Voila Prague, here we are.
The 30 minute walk to our hostel was less than pleasant but we were excited to be in Prague, I mean, it's Prague. The city that everyone raves about. Let's just say this Prague, I've had better. It might be because the city is swarming with toursits who push, shove, and yell or it might be the plethora of homeless people with their smoke, dogs, and smell. I really can't tell you what it is, but I much preferred Poland. The cities in Eastern Europe are just as pretty, less crowded, with better service and better food. Don't get me wrong, Prague is gorgeous, but when you combine it with the ugly tourist face, it get's less pretty as the day goes on. We went for a large and quite delicious breakfast at Bohemian Bagel, a little taste of home. We then tried to go tour the Old Town, got mad at all the tourists, and decided to go to a chocolate factory to make ourselves feel better. Wonderful experience as we were the only ones there. We got to pet some rabbits, learn about Mayan choclate drinks and paint with chocolate. Here is my painting of the old story of the sheep who was scared to go to hell because of the lion devil. Oh you don't know that one? I might have made it up, I can't remember. Those Nigerian kids books were weird.

We were given a quiz at the tour, which we of course answered perfectly. Here is our prize. Homemade Czech chocolate.

Our second attempt at touring Prague, although unwillfully, was much more successful. Maybe it was tourist nap time. We saw the Prague Castle, the changing of the guards, the botanical gardens, and some predatory birds. It was nice. Although Katie would have rather sat on a bench eating lody, which she made quite clear. My parenting convinced her to reluctantly enjoy the city. We took Frommer's suggestions of unforgettable moments and decided to go on a boat tour down the Vltava. Let's just say we will not be trusting Katie's book much longer. Very forgettable. But we got free lody, a free beer, and a guide that spoke Italian as a consolation.
We made our own unforgettable moment though. Watching the World Cup in the middle of the Old Town in Prague surrounded by people who like soccer. It was magical. I was rooting for England, because, let's face it, they have nice looking players. Wayne Rooney, yes please. Look at how happy we are! Forgettable? I think not.


The tie ended with Katie promising us small lodys, which we never received. I'm keeping the tally. We had wonderful plans for our next day beginning with a Catholic mass in the Czech language, the Jewish Quarter, Troja Castle to avoid the tourists, and a Black Light Theatre show. Wait till you hear about it all in one second.

Day 13:
We awoke early to attend Catholic mass at St. James church in the Old Town. My idea of course seeing as how I'm so close to Catholicism. It was a great experience. I understood nothing and felt completely awkward sitting there being Jewish, but, a cultural experience not many have had. I'll be adding it to the list of great things I've done. Next time, I'll try and be closer to my heritage and go to a Jewish service. But look how fancy (and clean) we are.

The Jewish Quarter, makes you pay. Not much for students, but quite a lot for people who forget their student ID's in the US (Katie). Think of all the lody you could have bought with the saved money :( We toured the synagogues which you can't take pictures of, so no evidence guys, no evidence. You can google them as they are quite simple, but striking. The Spanish Synagogue is particularly ornate and has a lot of crowns, silver, and books. A very interesting history I would say. I think the exhibit I enjoyed the most was the artwork from the children of the Terezin ghetto. Really special and mostly saddening. We went for a quick (that's really a relative term I guess) bite at the Franz Kafka cafe. Rick Steves' only terrible recommendation thus far. Don't go there, it's not pleasant. We then tried to avoid all the tourists by going to "Prague's hidden treasure" in Troja. The Troja castle. A 2.5 km walk from the Old Town. LIES. The castle, which was not on a map anywhere in Prague, is close to the Praha zoo. The zoo is an hour walk from the city. Great. Thanks Let's Go. We wandered around aimlessly at a less than pretty part of Prague for about an hour, asked a nice tattooed gentlemen how to get there, got the ugly truth, and left in anger. We were trying so hard to like Prague, but this is making it really difficult. Instead, we went back to our hostel, played on the computer/napped and then went to the a show called Studio Clip at the Black Light Theatre. Black Light shows are very unique to Prague involving black lights, acrobats, weird humor and some crudeness apparently. This is what we got: a mix of Lady Gaga, Cirque de Soleil, and psychedelic backgrounds. Very strange, but I guess a true Praha experience? I think I would recommend it if you're looking for the weird side of Prague, or the very weird side. Outside the theatre we found this gem in the midst of the World Cup frenzy:

Riding a soccer ball, maybe a new unforgettable moment in Praha. Tomorrow we head to Cesky Krumlov. What used to be an undiscovered part of the Czech Republic but apprently is now discovered by the tourist mob. We are hoping for the best, but I think we all decided that away from the mob is the best place to be. Poland, I miss you. Maybe in Hungary we can once again be alone with Europe. For now, we'll try our best to not hate Czechia and maybe enjoy the skies a little more.